My bus adventure!

Today I was a true DC businesswoman downtown! I rode the bus and the Metro, although I've been told that in DC it's not called "the" Metro...people just say "I'm riding Metro" and leave off "the." Odd. Anyways, I had to go downtown today to file amendments to our company's Articles of Incorporation and I figured it would be tough parking (although let's be honest - the chances of me actually finding my way downtown driving are slim to none) so I hopped on the local bus. After riding approximately an hour each way, I've decided that public transportation provides a whole lot more entertainment than any concert, comedy club, or circus put together and for only $1.35!! Here's a run down of the many "shows" that occurred on the D6 bus....

Musical numbers:

1. Man got on the bus rocking it out - dancing, air guitar, etc. - and the funny part was that he wasn't wearing headphones! Apparently, the music was only in his mind....pretty sure that's all there was up there.

2. A little taste of southern soul music courtesy of a large black woman....she was in fact wearing headphones, but she must have forgotten that only she could hear the music and the rest of us only heard her voice a cappella.

Public Service Announcements:

1. I was informed that the Devil controls 90% of souls on this earth.

Circus/Clown Appearances:

1. I was fairly certain at any moment the woman's hair 2 seats in front of me would turn into worms or snakes and we would have a "Snakes on a Bus" episode on our hands. Never seen such awful, nasty looking dreadlocks the color of mealworms!

2. Way too many non-matching outfits and contrasting patterns to even name....we had stripes and plaids, checkered pants and disney tops, hats with feathers, tights with holes, lots of hooker boots, and on and on.... Stacy and Clint would have a fit! Or better yet, call Carson Kressley to fix DC's bus population! That might be our best bet.

3. One guy jumped from seat to seat throughout the trip...every time someone left he took that seat - I suppose he was just reminiscing about a favorite childhood story (Goldilocks and the 3 Bears) and wanted to try out each seat to find the perfect one for him....too bad they are all exactly alike!

4. And my favorite outfit of all time....brings a whole new meaning to the Gothic look! A guy looking to be young to mid 20's with silver hoop and nail-like piercings in his eyebrow, lip, chin, and ears, a spike dog collar plus spike collars on both wrists, black leather jacket, black shirt, black leather pants laced up on each side with red shoelaces like a corset from his ankles to his waist, lace-up corset black boots with 4-5 inch platform heels, black nail polish, spiky rings on 4 fingers that looked like daggers extending past his knuckles, red tipped long hair, and to top it off (literally) a black fedora hat with a quail feather. It was really something. I wanted to get a picture, but was afraid of getting stabbed with a a knuckle, so I just committed the outfit to memory instead.

Miscellaneous Category:

1. A lady was rolling her own cigarettes in the seat next to me....CJ advised me that it probably wasn't "tobacco" she was rolling...hmmmm

2. The bus driver got annoyed at a guy trying to put his bicycle on the front of the bus, so he stormed out the bus door, grabbed the bicycle from the guy, slammed it on the front of the bus, locked it into place, and got back on the bus loudly wiping his hands back and forth (you know, the combo clapping/rubbing palms together)

3. Several YOUNG CHILDREN riding the bus by themselves home from school. Seriously, one little girl looked to be no older than 5th grade and she got on the bus, dropped her coins in the box, and rode a good 1/2 hour until she got off. What parents in their right mind would let a 5th grade girl ride the city bus on her own?!?!?! The bus stop where she got on wasn't even near a school, so she must have walked a little bit to get there. I felt like escorting the poor little thing home when she got off the bus, but then decided it obviously wasn't her first time doing this and it would be weird for a stranger to walk her home....hopefully she had been well schooled in the whole "Stranger Danger" lesson!

So, there you have the adventures of public transportation all for $1.35. Really, the D6 bus route should be added to the list of "Must Do" when visiting Washington, DC.